A Day in the Shop
by Empress of the Eclipse
Summary: Tai asks a favour of Matt. Slightly Taito-y, not much. The author takes no responsibility for the traumas that may be suffered after reading this fic.


A Day in the Shop  
By Starrysapphire, Taito Empress  
  
Disclaimer - I don't own any Digimon. There's a surprise for ya.  
Sorta Taito-y, not much. Quite possibly listed under traumatising.  
  
Matt was looking forward to a relaxed Saturday; doing nothing in the morning, followed by lunch, then a quick snooze before doing a long stint of nothing in the afternoon and then maybe doing nothing in the evening before bed. Until the phone rang.  
"Hello?"   
"Hi Matt, it's Tai."  
Matt rolled his eyes. That sounded ominous. Everytime Tai phoned him, Tai wanted him to do something active.  
"Hi Tai."  
"Look, I need your help," Tai said, obviously missing Matt's wary tone.  
"My help?"  
"Uh huh. It's Mimi's birthday in a week and I need to get her a present."  
"Why?" Matt asked.  
"Because that's considered kind in normal society circles," Tai said.  
Matt raised an eyebrow and coughed slightly. He heard Tai sigh.  
"And she got me soccer boots for my birthday," he said "Anyway, I have to get her something nice and I want your help."  
"Chocolate," Matt said.  
"Maaa-tt! I can't just buy her chocolate! I need you to come shopping with me."  
"Today?" Matt said, his heart sinking.  
"Yes."  
"No."  
"Oh please Matt!" Tai said, putting on his most begging tone "Please Yama-shanana-banana."  
"Yama what?"  
"It rhymes, it's an affectionate nickname," Tai said "C'mon, pretty, pretty please help me?"  
Matt scowled darkly. He could feel his resolves weakening. Tai sounded very desperate....  
And if he said no, Tai would probably start using his most pathetic voice and say that it was okay and not to worry about it and Matt would feel guilty for a month.  
"What do I get out of it?" he asked.  
"My eternal good-will and favour," Tai said "Please?"  
"On one condition," Matt said, sadly abandoning his dreams of a lazy Saturday.  
"What?"  
"You never ever call me 'Yama-shanana-banana' ever again."  
"Okay!" Tai said "I'll see you in five minutes!"  
He rang off. Matt sulkily put the phone down and began getting dressed. This was going to be a nightmare.  
* * * *  
Tai seemed to have an idea of what he was going to get Mimi, he dragged Matt straight to the mall. Matt let himself be dragged, hoping that this would be a short as possible and then he could at least do some of the nothing that he'd had planned.  
"Mimi likes clothes," Tai said "And she likes pink. So I figured I'd combine the two and give her some pink clothes."  
"Well done," Matt said sourly.  
"Oh cheer up!" Tai said "It's not so bad! I'll take you for a milkshake afterwards...."  
Matt rolled his eyes. He found himself smiling anyway. They walked into the shop that Tai had led them to and began to rummage though clothes racks.  
"I don't know if clothes are such a good idea," Matt said "You don't want to buy her anything that won't fit."  
Tai made a non-committal grunting sound. He was looking at a long pink dress with a matching bag. He already had a short pink skirt under his arm. Matt came over.  
"This one might look nice," Tai said.  
"Maybe," Matt said "But you won't know if it'll fit her or even look good on her."  
"I know," Tai said cheerfully "That's why I bought you along."  
"I don't know that either," Matt said, rolling his eyes for the second time.  
"Yeah but you and Mimi and about the same height....and you're as thin as her...." Tai said, scrutinising Matt.  
Matt suddenly felt a feeling of foreboding.  
"Now hang on," he said "You aren't suggesting..."  
Tai took the dress off the rack.  
"Tai," Matt said "Tell me that you are not thinking...."  
"Well I need to see how they'll fit," Tai said matter-of-factly, beginning to walk over to the changing cubicles.  
Matt stopped dead.  
"No. No way," he said "I am not going to try on a pink dress. Absolutely no way."  
"Oh come on," Tai said, grabbing his arm "You agreed to help me."  
"I agreed to help you, not put on a dress!" Matt hissed "I'm not going....no!"  
Tai dragged him over.  
"My friend would like to try these on please," he said to the slightly bored looking assistant.   
The assistant looked at Matt. Her eyes widened slightly.  
"But he's...." she began.  
"He's very open-minded," Tai said brightly "C'mon Matt."  
He dragged Matt over the changing cubicles and shoved him and the clothes into one.  
"Tai, I'm going to kill you!" Matt snarled "This is so humiliating!"  
"Just get them on!" Tai said.  
Matt gave a moan of protest and pulled off his jeans to wriggle into the pink skirt.  
"This is just a nightmare," he said out loud.  
"Just think about what a favour you're doing me," Tai said happily "Are you in it?"  
"Yes," Matt said, wishing that there weren't so many mirrors. He could see himself far too plainly.  
"Well, let's see then."  
"I'm not coming out!"  
"Well I can't come in," Tai said practically "Now let's see."  
Matt came out of the cubicle, glaring daggers at Tai.  
"It doesn't go with your top," Tai said.  
"Tai!"  
Tai giggled and thoughtfully inspected Matt.   
"Nice legs Ishida!"  
"TAICHI!"  
Tai started laughing again. He thoughtfully adjusted the skirt slightly. Matt stared at the ceiling and quietly pretended that this wasn't really happening, that this was just some terrible hallucination.  
"I'm not sure...." Tai said thoughtfully "Assistant!"  
"Tai, no!" Matt hissed but the girl had already come in. She looked at Matt and turned an unusual shade of purple. Matt could feel his face turning a beautiful tomato red.  
"Does it look okay?" Tai asked her.  
The assistant seemed to be having trouble getting the words out.  
"He might want to shave his legs before going out in public," she said, her words oddly choked.  
Matt wondered if anyone had ever spontaneously combusted out of embarrassment.  
"Good point," Tai said.  
"Is murder always a crime?" Matt asked.  
"Oh don't be silly," the assistant said "You look lovely, absolutely lovely. It's good to see someone so open-minded...."  
Her voice trailed off and she turned even more purple.  
"Go and try the dress on now," Tai ordered.  
"No way!"  
"I'll tell everyone you were trying on a pink skirt if you don't!" Tai threatened.  
Matt gave another groan and dived back into the cubicle. He got out of the skirt with relief and then pulled on the dress. It was silky and very clingy. Matt groaned.  
"C'mon, let's see!" Tai yelled.  
"Oh HELL!" Matt said.   
"C'mon Yama-shama!"  
"You promised not to call me that"  
"No I said I wouldn't call you Yama-shanana-banana. There's a difference," Tai said "Now let's see this dress!"  
Matt slowly walked out of the cubicle. Tai looked at him. Matt could feel his tomato darkening to scarlet.  
"Your face clashes with it."  
"I will kill you," Matt told him "Horribly. When you least expect it."  
Tai just giggled.  
"We'll just have to wait for the assistant to come back," he said "She was dealing with some customers...."  
"TK, do you think this would suit me?"  
"Try it on and see."  
Matt's eyes widened with horror. He tried to run but he nearly fell over the dress. TK and Kari walked into the back and then stopped and stared in amazement. Matt prayed that the floor would open and suck him down into it.  
"M-Matt?" TK squeaked.  
Kari began laughing. Dropping the skirt she'd been going to try on, she clung to TK howling. TK quickly joined her in hysterics. The assistant peered in and started to smile, her face returning to it's unusual purple shade.  
"Stop laughing!" Matt yelled, wondering if it was scientifically possible for him to blush any more "Stop laughing or I'll kill you all!"  
"I think you look great!" Kari choked "Really Matt. You look really pretty...."  
"Just gorgeous!" TK agreed and they started howling again.  
"Anyway, do you think I should buy it?" Tai asked the assistant.  
The assistant shook her head.  
"It doesn't hang quite right," she said.  
"Hmmmmm."  
Suddenly Tai's eyes lit up.  
"I know! Don't go anywhere!"  
He dived out.  
"Like I'm going to leave in this!" Matt hissed. He gave TK a super glare that only a brother could give. TK didn't stop laughing.  
Then Tai reappeared.  
"Here!" he said, throwing something at Matt "Try these on."  
Matt looked at what he had in his hand.  
"Tai!" he spluttered "I can't!"  
"Why not?" Tai said practically.  
TK and Kari looked at what Matt had in his hand and collapsed. The assistant helpfully provided them with chairs to sit on. She looked like she hadn't had such a good day for years.  
"Because it's girl's underwear!" Matt hissed.  
"So?"  
"So...there are things.....I'm missing," Matt said helplessly "And other things I've got that Mimi hasn't. Look, I'm not trying them on!"  
"Oh just get in there," Tai said.  
"But you don't need to try them on!" Matt wailed "It's scientifically impossible to have knickers the wrong size!"  
"Oh that's not true!" the assistant said happily "It's always best to check the size first."  
"SHUT UP!" Matt shouted at her. She gave him an ear-to-ear grin.  
"Exactly," Tai said "Now get in there Matt and get those knickers on!"  
Matt slunk back into the cubicle. Slowly he changed.  
"Hurry up!" he heard TK call.  
Matt inched out of the cubicle trying to turn himself invisible by the power of his thoughts. There was a pause as he stood there in pink knickers and a bra. Then TK made a strange sound and slid of his chair. The assistant managed to catch Kari before she did the same but she was turning an extraordinary blackberry colour by this time and had to drop Kari and run out. Tai just stood there looking completely unaffected by all of this.  
"Hmmmm...well...." he said thoughtfully "I don't know...move about a bit Matt, let's see if they ride up...."  
"It's not decent!" Matt snarled "I'm not moving anywhere!"  
"Oh come on Matt, it's all to help me..."  
"I'm never helping you ever again!"  
"Well you've done all this!" TK said "It can't hurt to move round a bit..." his voice trailed off into laughter again.  
Matt looked around for the nearest window that he could jump out of. Or maybe throw Tai out of, he wasn't entirely sure which one.  
"I'm not moving!" he said.  
"Oh well," Tai said "I guess they'll do. Maybe those and the pink skirt."  
"Can I get changed again now?" Matt asked, his face throbbing with humiliation.  
"Sure," Tai said.  
Matt shot into the cubicle, got out of the underwear and yanked on his own clothes, still burning with utter mortification. He'd never wanted to die more in his whole life. He was going to kill Tai, then TK, then Kari and then the shop assistant. Slowly and horribly. He came out to find Tai waiting. TK and Kari had gone, probably to tell everyone what they'd seen. He shoved the clothes at Tai who bought them cheerfully. Then he grabbed Matt's arm.  
"Come on! I'll buy you that milkshake!" he said.  
"Like a milkshake can make up for this!" Matt said grumpily.  
"What about this then?" Tai suggested.   
He caught hold of Matt, pulled him close and kissed him very lightly on the lips. Matt froze solid with shock.  
"That's for being so hot in girl's clothes Ishida," Tai whispered before letting him go "I'll see you at the milkshake bar."  
He left the shop, leaving a stunned Matt staring after him and an extremely happy shop assistant wondering if any of her friends would ever believe her about this day in the shop.  
The End.  
  
Enjoy? Too traumatising for words? Say in the REVIEW which I know you're gonna give me....  



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